Pirate the Waves

Have you ever sailed the ocean before? I am a pirate, which means sailing the ocean is second nature to me. I don’t live on the land anymore; I live in my boat. It’s decked out (get it, decked? haha) with all of my favourite things.

I’m not a typical pirate. I am a good pirate. I steal from the rich and give to the poor. Like Bobin Sood, but on the ocean. I even spent a bit more money on my boat in order to add a boat decal to the hull. The goal was for it to be super distinctive, so that rich sailors would see me coming in the distance and try to run away. Or, sail away, I guess. I like the chase. I like it even more because I always win. I had planned for my boat decal to look beautiful so that it matches my face, but after the company completed the sticker design, I discovered just why you shouldn’t get a sticker of your own face and put it directly on the hull material.

I had asked for the sticker to look like me, but stronger and manlier and with eyes that were scary. It needed to freak people out as I sailed toward them. And at the beginning, it was pretty good, I have to admit. It was beautiful. But in hindsight, I should have paid the extra to invest in a vinyl boat print. It didn’t take long before the sticker began to fade away. Less than a week after it was completed, my painted eyes began to droop off the hull and my muscles faded away. I imagined my boat probably looked a whole lot less intimidating to all the rich people I was attempting to steal from. I didn’t want to be the joke of the ocean – word travels fast along the waves, and soon I would earn a nickname I would never be able to escape from. I had to change the design, and fast.

Categorized as Boats